Maya (High school student film)

[Jeff Dunant]

Like every young filmmaker I followed the camera industry very closely, looking at all the high end equipment I never thought I would be able to use. Red, was one of them. I would visit the Red site often, I browsed the forums often... I was just in love with the camera.

This summer I was asked if I wanted to help out with a local independent film, which I, of course, said yes to instantly. Then I found out we would be using the Red One. I felt like a five year old at Christmas. Production lasted about twelve days, in which I actually spent the night on set (wherever it was that night) with a handful of the crew. It was the experience of a lifetime.

The crew became pretty close, so a few weeks after we were done with the main production of the indie film, the camera owner was gracious enough to let me borrow the camera for a weekend to shoot my own project and I am forever in his debt.

Maya on Vimeo

Anyways! I would like constructive criticism for this piece. It is my second movie and I already learned a massive amount shooting and editing it (I made a lot of mistakes, which is good) but I want people's overall opinions. Please don't sugar coat it.

I plan to submit it to some local youth festivals and use it on my college applications.

If the movie doesn't make sense, then here is the definition of the word Maya, but I encourage you to watch it a few times.

Thanks for watching!

 

[Rudi Herbert]

If the movie doesn't make sense, then here is the definition of the word Maya, but I encourage you to watch it a few times.

I haven't seen the film yet as the Vimeo download is slow, but while I wait, I will give you a piece of advice which is simple. However clever, beautiful and fascinating an idea upon which you base a film is, it should require a few times to "get it" and you encouraging people to watch anything a few times comes across as pedantic, even if I'm sure it's not what you mean. There's a line between the projects we love and how we would love to bring them to fruition and how to actually do it in a way that gets you noticed and perceived as a down-to-earth film maker and not another "artist" whose films must be watched several times to get gotten....

But on a positive note, you got to shoot your first project and on RED to boot, so you have nowhere to go but forward from here. Good Luck!

 

[Jeff Dunant]

I understand where you are coming from however, my favorite movie of all time is probably Memento. I don't know if you have seen that movie or not, but it is one of those movies that you get something different out of the film every time you watch it and even now it still sparks debate when between my friends and I. I love movies like that, and that was the kind of thing I was going for when making this piece. This project is more of a personal movie, anyways. My next project that I am cooking is much less ambiguous.

 

[Will Keir]

Well you did a good job technically with the RED, you shot, figured out the work flow and most importantly you made a final piece with a camera that's possibilities almost seem endless. Your working with a medium, as a high school student, that can rival the highest end projects in the world. How many 18 year olds can say that? Awesome work!

So here's some short constructive criticism.

The shot framing felt weak for the most part. Even a few bad ones in with the good make the piece overall seem weak. Take your best stuff, you wouldn't go to a job interview with your best cloths and old basketball shoes?

The computer scene, looks bad. In his bedroom, bad. This is a powerful camera, what makes it so powerful is it's ability to capture depth of field, you could use this more to your advantage.

Too many still boring shots, add some movement to your motion picture.

The acting is terrible. Starting your film with a girl reading lines for your opening makes me want to close the window I'm playing it in. You seem serious about making films, get actors that are serious about making your films look good. The words could have been powerful too, they seemed nicely written but when I see her looking down reading the lines... know what I'm saying?

Music & Sound. Your jumping up and down here, these tools should ease me in and out of the moments and should have a flow to them.

The story... It's simple and it's emotional, it's also personal from what you have wrote and so in that sense it's the perfect story for you to tell and you should be proud you had the courage to put it out there and post on a professional forum for feed back.

For a better sense of what framing works, watch movies, pick your favorites, what do they do and in what style? I love gladiator, so I tried a shot today that grabbed me when I first saw the film. Here it is with no color correction.

 

[Zakaree Sandberg]

there were a few shots that you let the action go out of focus (lack of pulling the focus)
practice this on any camera with a lens adapter.

also, I encourage you to watch a lot of movies and study framing, and lens choice..
certain shots really require a certain lens to make the picture flow.
This movie was pretty Jumpy as far as cuts go.
But good job on making yourself a movie, keep it up.

 

[Will Keir]

encouraging people to watch anything a few times comes across as pedantic

Well said, I reviewed the film, I wouldn't watch it a second time. Only your Mom does this for you.

 

[DCC Erickson]

"Coming of Age" is one of the biggest cliche themes in the business. Every kid "comes of age". Try a little harder. Be a writer/director, but don't get distracted by technology - the story comes before everything. Congratulations on completing the project in collaboration with others, that's a feat in itself.

 

[Julio Quintana]

It's certainly better than anything I was making in high school. You have a lot to learn, but that comes with time and passion. Good job.