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  • Hey all, just changed over the backend after 15 years I figured time to give it a bit of an update, its probably gonna be a bit weird for most of you and i am sure there is a few bugs to work out but it should kinda work the same as before... hopefully :)

Worst Recent Films Lists (You know what to do)

Joe G. said:
10. MAGNOLIA: Pretentious twaddle with a few decent scenes. As a movie, it's a wreck. My wife says, "The emperor wears no clothes."​
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Sorry but I am in love with Magnolia. We're on the same page with the rest!

Worst in no particular order:
Transformers 2
Transformers
Terminator Salvation
The Sum Of All Fears (A real letdown considering how much I enjoyed the book)
Every "Fantastic 4"
Aliens Vs. Predator (Again, I seriously had high hopes)
Hancock​
 
Oh boy... the pages I could fill...

Anyway, these threads are always interesting because so much is subjective. But I think there's a good running list forming here that many will agree on; Transformers movies, #2 especially, Terminator Salvation, etc.. Of course, many of those don't really scratch the surface of how truly bad a movie can really be. But that's fine, I think these movies listed here are better listed as the biggest disappointments or let-downs. If anyone wants to see bad, there's no shortage of indie crap out there, B-Horror, Transmorphers, etc..

I think I agree with most posted thus far. I do have to say that "Team America" was funny, I realize many don't appreciate comedic satire, especially when in such crude or vulgar form. But I thought the movie was great for what it was. And some of the best modern day comedic war satire to come our way.

Have to agree about the National Lampoon's movies too. Although, I like the Christmas Vacation one and it's the only other one that I think can hang with the original Vacation movie on some level. Animal House is still the king and no one has been able to make a similar themed film to top it yet. As much as they might try...

"Lost in Translation" was OK. But I think the movie was truly lost in translation on most movie goers. For those not familiar with Japan or who have never been there, it just doesn't have the same meaning. I thought the story itself was rather lacking, but interesting characters, simple and perhaps even likable. I don't care if I ever see it again, though.

Some movies listed here I have never seen, nor will I ever attempt to see them. "Date Movie", "Meet the Spartans", WTF??? People actually expected any entertainment from those? Really? Naming those and typical B-Horror, regurgitated shocker/horror or spoof comedy teen crap is too easy. Fish in a barrel for a topic like this. It's like saying, "Texas Chainsaw Massacre" the 2005(?) version. It's a shitty low budget remake of a shitty film. It's supposed to suck by design. ...And it did.

Lucas, I saw Space Chimps too. I feel your pain, man... My kids thought it sucked and they were asking to leave before it was half over.

"Hancock" Oh man... So much potential. Just when it started to look promising, they totally ruined it. Who wrote this crap? It didn't make my list below, but only because Transformers and Superman Returns pissed me off more.

________________

Anyway, here's my top 20 list of worst movies or most disappointing films ever made, in no particular order, it seems that many have been mentioned here already several times.

* Start Trek: Generations -- Quite possibly the worst movie ever made. Buffalo Bill said it better; "Fuck You, Rick Berman!"

* Signs

* Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull

* Mission to Mars

* Transformers 2 -- This one earned bonus points for a new level of shittyness and is also a contender for "worst movie ever made".

* Terminator Salvation -- Truly mind boggling. This could have been epic, but they took a shitty script, made it shittier just before shooting, and well, it's not even worth analysis. Took an awesome franchise and flushed it.

* Fantastic 4 (and I didn't bother to watch the sequel, I'm sure it was worse)

* Ang Lee's "Hulk"

* Premonition

* 88 Minutes

* Austin Powers: Goldmember -- I honestly thought the first film was fun, but it was downhill from there.

* Matrix:Revolutions

* Night at the Museum II: Battle at the Smithsonian -- My family and I really enjoyed the first one. Probably Ben Stiller's best film. But this second one was a total let-down. What a mess.

* The Core - I netflixed it just to see how bad it really was, it exceeded my expectations. Who greenlighted this pile of manure?

* Sphere -- Given the cast, you think it would've been watchable. Then again, Samuel L. Jackson will do anything for a paycheck. If you need further proof, see "Snakes on a Plane".

* Superman Returns -- Kevin Spacey is a perfect Lex Luthor, though.

* Space Chimps

* The Sum of all Fears -- pretty much anything with Ben Affleck in it anyway, but damn did this book to movie translation get fucked up.

* Speed -- Yeah, it's an older one, but it's also in the running for "Worst movie ever made".

* Star Wars Prequels. Jeezus, George. You had over 20 F'n years to come up with a good story. W-T-F???

* For the last entry, I can't decide if it should be "Independence Day" or "The Patriot". Roland Emmerich, you suck.
 
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"I do have to say that "Team America" was funny, I realize many don't appreciate comedic satire, especially when in such crude or vulgar form."


And overtly racist.

I don't find racist humor funny, although I'm sure the Nazis produced some gut splitting -- what they called -- "satire" in their day.

I guess no one noticed that the theme throughout Team America was that the ends justify the means. The evil boogeyman "terrorists" have WMDs, and so whatever America chooses to do is justified. This is not questioned, and just accepted.

I guess it also slipped past that the United States committed the "supreme international crime" a Crime Against the Peace on a very big lie concerning these WMDs (which the US possesses, in excess of 10,000).

One point five million dead Iraqis later, I don't find it funny at all.

Their criminal war rationale was bolstered in this film, and not satirized, throughout. But, I guess that can be missed if you're laughing at all the funny stupid A-rabs, and the mindless puppet romance.
 
Joe G. said:
I guess no one noticed that the theme throughout Team America was that the ends justify the means. The evil boogeyman "terrorists" have WMDs, and so whatever America chooses to do is justified. This is not questioned, and just accepted.
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I think you missed the target of the satire. It was mocking the stupid racist A-Rab calling Americans. You make it sound like it was glorifying the American position. Which I'm relatively certain was the opposite intent of the film makers.

It would be like watching Stephen Colbert and thinking he was serious.
 
Am I the only person who loved Armageddon? I can live with that. Pure, cheesy entertainment with bitchin' special effects. Same with Transformers.

Transformers 2, I could not get behind, no matter how much I tried. Even with Devastator in 70mm glory, I yawned.

My worst list:

Deathproof. I should have left after Planet Terror and maintained my happiness.

The Mummy: Tomb of The Dragon Emperor. When they start making ass-slapping jokes 10 minutes in, I knew it was going to be rough.

XXX: State of the Union. Do I really need to explain why?

The Matrix Revolutions. Oooooh, I get it, Neo is Jesus! Tee hee. Worst epic boss fight ever. It reminded me of Dragonball Z.

Dragonball: Evolution. WHY WAS THIS MADE?

The Village

Kill Bill

Twilight

Spider-Man 3

X-Men 3.

That's it off the top of my head. Jeff, I have to disagree strongly with you on one specific point- Generations. I. Love. That. Movie. It's lit weirdly, and I know I have more of a sentimental attachment to it, but I loved that movie. Just not as much as First Contact.
 
Ryan,

Good additions. I forgot about a couple you listed. Matrix Revolutions should probably be on my list. What a piece of shit that was... Matrix Reloaded was bad enough, I was hoping they would redeem themselves. Ooops, nope.

Kill Bill I agree with. But it was exactly when I expected going into it. ZZZzzzzz...

Spidey-3 and X-Men 3 were both pretty terrible too, I agree.

I never went to see The Mummy:Totally stupid stupid Dragon Emperor movie, so can't comment. XXX: Saw the first one, that was more than enough. Dragonball: Why would you even consider watching it?

Have not seen Twilight. Did not interest me one bit. My wife has read the books, she saw it and said it sucked. No interest in this household to see the sequel.

Forgot about DeathProof -- yeah, it was pretty bad. But Planet Terror was watchable, so the night wasn't a total loss.

I couldn't get into Armageddon. Just too much cheese sauce drizzled over so many technical blunders, misconceptions and fallacies. Looking back on it, I'll pull it off my list. Plenty of more deserving movies should be there on the list in its place. There, fixed.

Generations... Just go watch the Buffalo Bill Review. It sums up most of my feelings just fine. I wanted to like that movie, even love it. I'm a Trekkie, but that movie just didn't make any sense. Too bad, because I thought Malcolm McDowell did brilliant in his part of Dr. Sauron and could have been one of the greatest villains in Star Trek history, but oh well, too bad the story sucked so bad. Of the TNG movies, First Contact is probably my favorite. I really liked the darker direction they took it, but someone really needs to scribble out the words "TIME TRAVEL" on a couple large pieces of 20-grit sandpaper and shove them up Rick Berman's and Michael Pillar's arses. Same with the new J.J. Abrams Star Trek. I liked it overall, because I like Star Trek. But I'm sick of the lame bad guys and over-use of time travel that proliferates Star Trek these days. Come up with something new already, Dammit!
 
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I agree, all the Fantastic Four Movies

X-Man 3, DeathProof, any Twilight movie already made or that ever will be made..

Worst Casting Ever, Dr Doom. It's Dr Doom goes 90210..Thought he was going to offer the Thing plastic surgery.
 
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Jeff Kilgroe said:
Dragonball: Why would you even consider watching it?
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When I was an awkward and speckled 15-year old, I was a huge fan of the Dragonball series. It was around then that they announced there was going to be a live-action adaptation, and rumours flew for the next 9 years about who would direct it, how big the budget would be, etc.

Because it took so long to materialize and my tastes evolved, I ultimately missed the trailers and theatrical release, but I saw it on the plane on the way to China this summer, because I had already seen everything else.

Twilight I saw because everyone either loved and hated it, and I make a point of seeing films like that.

I will watch that Generations review. As it was, I think I was 7 or 8 when I saw it, and movies that I loved at that age stick with me regardless of their foibles. I mean, the first movie I ever saw was Top Gun.

For those who listed the Fantastic 4 films (and I agree wholeheartedly) do you think the reboot will be an improvement? I've been having this discussion with a friend- the reboot, along with the Spiderman one, are apparently going to be in the vein of the newest trend: REAL, GRITTY and DARK(TM).

Ooh, I forgot about The Sum of All Fears. And Aliens vs Predator.
 
I think anyone who did not like Death Proof should see this doc (http://www.notquitehollywood.com.au/) to give it some context. Death Proof has the best crash scene ever made on film. It has a chase scene that is better than all the chase scenes combined in Vanishing Point.
 
Ryan S said:
I will watch that Generations review. As it was, I think I was 7 or 8 when I saw it, and movies that I loved at that age stick with me regardless of their foibles. I mean, the first movie I ever saw was Top Gun.
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Ah,yes. Age does play a huge role in our perception of movies. There are several movies I loved when I was a kid and then I go back and watch them again, only to have my memories crushed. :crying:

I don't know if I like the overly gritty and dark trend for super hero films. Personally, I like gritty and dark for a lot of films, especially science fiction, fantasy, etc.. But super heroes like Spidey are something that needs and deserves mass audience appeal. It's something I want my young children to be able to watch and relate to as I did when I was a kid. As much as I like Nolan's spin on BatMan, neither film are something I would feel comfortable letting my daughter watch (she's almost 7).

I'm not overly thrilled about a Spider-Man reboot. Everything was near perfect with Raimi's first Spidey film. The second one wasn't bad, but had a couple trouble spots. The third, well, it just sucked and I think there was a lot of pressure there to really up the ante over the previous films. Unfortunately they took the wrong road and tried to cram too much shtuff into one film at the expense of just about anything that could have been worth watching. Whatever...

Lucas Wilson said:
I had never seen that. I'm dying over here. Damn, that was funny!!!!

Love the explanation of the Rocket shooting at the sun. Friggin classic...

Lucas
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If you have never seen it, check out the guy's review of Star Wars: Episode I. It is THE - BEST - MOVIE - REVIEW - EVER. His comparison between the openings of Episode I and Episode IV is so spot-on correct, it should be required viewing in any film studies course.
 
I am definitely not getting the Death Proof hate. It seems a lot of people didn't like it. I loved it. Kurt Russell was amazing and hilarious.

The worst movie I've seen recently was that one with Ben Affleck, Surviving Christmas.

There are some movies that are bad in a good way, and some that are just, fuckin terrible.
 
bad movies.

bad movies.

I could right several books about how bad Transformers 1 and 2 were. The problem is that there are good things about them and when 1 came out I REALLY WANTED TO LIKE IT. I had low expectations and it was far below those though. Spiderman 3 was awful for sure and like many have said Team America is a classic and will be watched for 20 more years.
 
I have to add two.

The Island

The worst case of 'off-the-shelf' characters I have ever seen. Made it close to unbearable. I only stuck around to watch the interesting set design. Very sad to see some accomplished individuals fail so miserably as a cast.

Michael Bay of course. Focusing on the cool sci-fi elements, and not the human story - assuming there was one on paper to begin with.

Inside Man

For me anyways, it was clear a few of the actors really didn't get along. Ice cold chemistry. Maybe they had a tiff over top billing.

Also HATED the pooh-bear dialogue between Denzel and his squeeze. Nausiating. 'Bout tossed my pizza.

Kinda liked the plot, hated most of the dialogue - with the only high point being Plummer calling Foster a cunt (I like Foster by the way, just loved the delivery of the line). A few of the peripheral characters, like the dumb cop and the hooker, were totally useless additions.

That's my two cents.
 
Wait, can I add one more?

The made-for-TV "Cinderella" ...

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0128996/

... With Whoopi Goldberg, Jason Alexander and (ugh) Brandy.

This was the world's lamest attempt ever to jam PC thinking down our throats and insist we like it. Right, just let me don my 3D rose-colored glasses and make a bowl of nuke-free popcorn.

Give me a break.
 
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