Hey all, just changed over the backend after 15 years I figured time to give it a bit of an update, its probably gonna be a bit weird for most of you and i am sure there is a few bugs to work out but it should kinda work the same as before... hopefully :)
I think for an ad I would keep it at 30 seconds. Also, the clipped highlights have gone magenta. Use the DRX slider to neutralize those highlights to white.
Was that all hand held- seemed like way too much motion. Is this meant to be a TVC? If so 30 seconds is pretty much your time limit; with many agencies now asking us for :15's, though if it's meant to be a web only thing- take your time.
I also agree that grading the footage would help it a lot, even just adding a bit of a look in RCX.
Agree that the shots are too long.
Suggest shooting it at night for the fire effect.
And have 2 people in it so they can sort of honor their friend with a toast or something.
It's too much for one person to act out here.
You have good writing and a strong concept. Here are the things that stand out:
Your product shot at beginning and end does not "feature" you product well enough.. Needs to be larger in the screem.
I agree with everyone else about the color correction, or lack thereof
WAAAYYYY to long.. Do this in :30 for sure.
Your shots and framing, as well as the camera motion lack focus. You "covered" what happened, but you did not tell a story with the camera.
You put too much focus on the object, and not enough on the person creating it. That's where your story is. But when you do shoot her creating the memorial, you need to be tighter, more abstract wiht product always present, and easy to see in screen. Do not show the whole thing until it's being set on fire. You needed a shot with memorieal on fire in foreground,, with girl on shore about 30 ft away, so show her solitude.
You have a good idea.. Now get back out there and do it justice! Good luck
(Sorry for bad grammer and writing.. Just woke up)
Shorten it, grade it, then WATCH it as if you didn't know what it was for. A commercial should tell a story, but not let you forget what it's selling..