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  • Hey all, just changed over the backend after 15 years I figured time to give it a bit of an update, its probably gonna be a bit weird for most of you and i am sure there is a few bugs to work out but it should kinda work the same as before... hopefully :)

Hidden Talents of RED Users

RED Crew rises from the Phoenix......

RED Crew rises from the Phoenix......

liquidigital said:
Okay Mark! I laughed my ass off at the other posts, but then I felt bad that you have great intentions and prob didn't get the answers you expected......
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Far from it mate this is even better than I expected. I can just see it all now......

liquidigital, if I can ask you to get the headshots for the central crew members in order to start the REDCREW listings. Your stuntman training will come in handy, especially seeing as you will need to drop in on Desert Rune at around 26,000ft, stay down wind though just in case :huh: Uhhhh, also be wary of his jump buddy Luki, I'd suggest putting velcro on any pockets to avoid 'accidents', he's a funny one is Luki!

Once you hit the ground, slowly now, there will be a car waiting for you. OK, so its gonna looks a bit odd but the CVBVector1 is a prototype currently under scrutiny by Chrysler. We were going to use Zakarees Lexus but we had to send it to the garage to get that crap leak sorted out. Not to worry though even though his car couldn't make it, the man himself is there. Just make your own judgment was it the Lexus with a crap leak or is his driving anough to scare the crap out of anything....:ohmy: If after a few miles you get nervous I think the production manager put an iPod in the glove compartment. Check out the vibes, I think there's also a few soothing Cello concertos courtesy of im.thatoneguy Uhhhh, don't get that confused with Jaime Valles Hand Fart Overture in d minor! I think I ordered my assistants to get rid of that anyway.

If you get uncomfortable with the driving I'd suggest flagging down our props logistics supervisor BajaProductions he should be somewhere along the same stretch of road on a delivery for the caterers, just be wary of what he is actually shifting gear with....:ohmy: I've heard rumors that sexual deviants tend to flee to live south of the border and last I knew the border patrol were particularly keen of locating a truck driving, sdick shifting trucker with a penchant for guzzling coffee whilst engaging in cell phone conversation to all manner of 1-800 services.

I know it's a lot to ask. Many people to track down but if you get a bit peckish, need some sustenance, I'd suggest stopping at one of the many fast food outlets along the way. Just off of I-95 there's a place called "Pixel's Chilli Chewsdays", yeah I raised my eyebrows too, anyway its a relatively cheap place to get some good nosh. The Chilli is for crap, I'd suggest the Spaghetti. Any given day its a toss up, best asking the Pixelchef his recommendation. hey one thing to check out is their amazing waiter service. I know it takes about ten minutes to get the grub ready but, turn away for a second and BAMM, the food is served with no trace of the waiter. Super Speedy Service by some dood they call Greg Syverson well, it could be anyone actually as no one's ever seen this guy anyway. After that stop you should be fine. If you need a small top up though there's a neat little Burrito stand just outside, say hi to Jeremy Toman for me too, ohhh, get his card too as I may have a place for him to cater my next project, Revenge of the Chilli Doggs!

Long day huh? Yeah, well almost done. Once you got those head shots, I know you're a whizz with Photoshop but I promised my co-Producers that I'd drop some work their way. My main exec has a nephew with a photographic service just off of Santa Monica Boulevard. If you could pop into "Speedy's Processing and Imagery Services" and speak to a guy called Justin Kirsch and leave everything with him. They have my office contact details so no worries.........oh and uhhhhh, take a sleeping bag just in case! Not the most efficient office worker around.......:sad:

Been a long day I know but thanks for the work mate. We're on the verge of something big, you in?

hehehe,
Cheers,
Mark.

EDIT: Love a good giggle. Any progress on the serious pointers would also be welcomed.
 
A fundamental flaw is that I was pretty much just a fightguy. No skydives. No driving. But I know a couple people if you need them. lol
 
I have been known to put both feet in my mouth.
 
There is really a lot of hidden talents here. I am impressed.
Maybe we can do something for the America's funniest home video with all this talents combined. Shot on Red of course.
 
"A human being should be able to change a diaper, plan an invasion, butcher a hog, conn a ship, design a building, write a sonnet, balance accounts, build a wall, set a bone, comfort the dying, take orders, give orders, cooperate, act alone, solve equations, analyze a new problem, pitch manure, program a computer, cook a tasty meal, fight efficiently, die gallantly. Specialization is for insects." - Robert Heinlein

I've tried to live by this sentiment... and as such have rendered myself pretty much unemployable. It turns out that specialization is also for getting good jobs. I've got that whole "Jack of all trades- master of none" things going on here.

So if you're going to be airlifted into into you-don't-know-where to accomplish you-don't-know-what... then I'm your man. If you know where you're going and what you're doing when you get there... you can almost always find someone who can do that better than me.
 
I'm faster than Greg.

Not only can I fart with my hands, but I can squirt a jet of water with my hands up to 50 feet. (yes, seriously)

I can put my whole fist in my mouth... If my foot isn't already there.

Like Clint, I'm a Jack Of All Trades sort of guy. And highly opinionated too. No one in their right mind would hire me. I'm doomed to be self-employed forever, lest I must lie on my resume and pretend I only know how to do one or two things halfway good. Oddly enough, my weakest abilities are the ones I have the most passion for. Perhaps it's the challenge that draws me to the visual arts, when I'm so much better at other things, too many things to list.
 
I am telling you I have you all beat.

When I was born the doctor turned me over and said "HEY LOOK TWINS" He said later he was tempted to slap my mom instead of me. My mom use to take me swimming...all the other kids were ice skating. My dad still gets mad when I jump up in his arms and hug him. Guess at 47 I should not be doing that anymore. I give political incorrect a whole new spin. My age surpassed my IQ years ago. I am older now...It now takes me all night to do what I use to do all night. My boss called me into the office the other day and said I was lazy, worthless, always late and drunk most of the time. I looked at him and said "and your point is? ". Somebody asked how my sex life was the other day. I replied. Great~! it reminds me of my first time. I was alone then too. When I was married my wife only had one problem and that was me. I remember one night when I was married. I came home early from trying to find a job. It was late at night. The phone rang. I did not want to wake my wife so I answered in a quiet soft voice "Hello" The man on the other end wanted to know if the coast was clear. Boy did I get mad. The coast is over 100 miles from where I live. How the heck should I know if it is clear or not. the nerve of some people. If it were not for bad luck I would not have any at all. I am not a looser...close but not a looser. I not a big drinker. Most of the time it is just one or two....one or two many that is. I have never been drunk. OK perhaps over served a few times.

Just remember when you are down and things are not going that well, I am that guy that has it worse than you.

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Zakaree said:
as of today, i can drive the crap out of my car...
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Zakaree,

What do you drive? Where and how do you drive? Track, drift, underground? Seriously. I shoot motorsports.

-Thor
 
BajaProductions said:
Good post Mark. Maybe the outcome was not what you hoped it would be. BUt it is funny.

so I will add: I can drink a coffee in left hand, hold cell phone in right hand and steer my truck down a straight road...AND shift (stick shift) gears---go figure? Yes, shift and do all that---I'm sure that will come in useful on this forum some place. I'm not sure how I should call this talent though. Please give recomendations?:help:
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Move up to Los Angeles...You'll fit right in.
 
Thor Wixom said:
Zakaree,

What do you drive? Where and how do you drive? Track, drift, underground? Seriously. I shoot motorsports.

-Thor
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I drive the 5 north to work everyday.
I was mainly referring to the shoot we did the other day involving a 2 car chase.
My is250 was the camera car, and i had to keep up with a porsche and camero
 
Zakaree said:
I drive the 5 north to work everyday.
I was mainly referring to the shoot we did the other day involving a 2 car chase.
My is250 was the camera car, and i had to keep up with a porsche and camero
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Nice!

I hope we get to see some footage from that.

I have good connections with pro drivers and cars if you need help organizing a test shoot.

Also, there's a sweet box canyon near the north I-15, I-215 interchange that would be easy to close down and it's not too far from you guys.

-Thor
 
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