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  • Hey all, just changed over the backend after 15 years I figured time to give it a bit of an update, its probably gonna be a bit weird for most of you and i am sure there is a few bugs to work out but it should kinda work the same as before... hopefully :)

Eloise "The Doc"

Wow, looks like a very interesting topic. Sorry to be critical here, but I feel like your tone is all over the place in the trailer. I'm still not sure what this is due to the varying tones. The beginning, which I liked a lot, was that of a documentary. I was waiting for some interviews to pop in. But then, it sort of switched to a genre, horror flick at the end...and the voice over at the end sounded like a local car sale VO trying to do movies.

Hope that doesn't come across as too harsh. I actually am very interested in seeing this, so I hope you can get the marketing of it in the right place! Good luck.

Kevin
 
Ivan,

I really liked the trailer. Please take this as constructive and understand that I really love all of the elements you have pulled together to tell a compelling story in a short time.

The only thing I would comment on is the voice that you cast for the trailer. I would try a version without a voice at all, it might be more effective. Or maybe the voice could be that of a little girl or something more related to the story, rather than a TV announcer type, which really took me out of the story you were telling (me) so well up to that point in the trailer.

Looks really good.


David
 
Kevin Wild said:
Wow, looks like a very interesting topic. Sorry to be critical here, but I feel like your tone is all over the place in the trailer. I'm still not sure what this is due to the varying tones. The beginning, which I liked a lot, was that of a documentary. I was waiting for some interviews to pop in. But then, it sort of switched to a genre, horror flick at the end...and the voice over at the end sounded like a local car sale VO trying to do movies.
Click to expand...

Totally agree in terms of the trailer, it started of really well but the end let it down. I wasn't to keen on the "Why were..." titles, it kinda implies that i know about the graves and human testing which obviously i didn't (if you get what i mean!)

The shots at the beginning looked good and the pan through the barbed wire around 0:43 was amazing!

I guess from the description that this was just a rough trailer so would love to see the final one!
 
I should of posted it here before making live on the web! DAM ME! No big deal, with all these suggestions, I am going back and making some changes.

As for the v.o. this guys great and has been doing it for quite some time. We originally had v.o. through out the entire trailer but he sounded to animated and I didn't like it. I was going for something a little more creepy. So I'm thinking I'll just remove it.

I also made this very short so not really much room for interviews. But hey, if an investor comes along and sees what they like, that can all change.

Steven Waterfall said:
Totally agree in terms of the trailer, it started of really well but the end let it down. I wasn't to keen on the "Why were..." titles, it kinda implies that i know about the graves and human testing which obviously i didn't (if you get what i mean!)
Click to expand...

I really like your idea here! Now by removing these two text phrases, I can add 2 more clips!

I'll post up the changes in the next few days. Thanks guys!!
 
Ivan, if I were you, I would do one that is a bit more documentary style. It seems like now it is 1/2 doc and 1/2 narrative, so it's confusing to the viewer. I googled it to even see if it's real and it sounds like a great idea for a doc. I would personally start with just a couple of your questions/facts and start with some interview bytes to tease the story. Remember, "less is more" in a tease, so feel free to leave us hanging. :-)

You have something nice happening with this. I look forward to seeing V2 and the final movie.

Kevin
 
Ya unfortunately its a one man show for now. There's room for improvement this isn't solid, once again just brief...

I am uploading the new revision now.
 
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