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Seeking A Lobotomy After Watching Sucker Punch

Andrew Rieger

Andrew Rieger

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Dear Sucker Punch,

Just when I thought that blockbusters could not get any worse, you had to walk into my life. It was a wild, sickening ride and unfortunately, there is no way that I can get back the two hours I wasted this evening watching you. Your company was about as pleasant as a sucker punch to the balls. I will be honest babydoll, you make Battle LA look like a masterpiece. At this point, I'm pretty sure that only a lobotomy could rid my mind of your awfulness. I'm considering it, I really am. I am currently punching myself for spending $10 on my ticket but Warner Brothers are the real losers for spending $100 million on you. Anyways darling, I wish you a slow and painful death at the box office.

Love,
A film fanatic who is now considering taking up competitive knitting in lieu of weekend trips to the theater.
 
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Heard the same about Battle LA from a friend whose opinion I trust. Thanks for the heads up, I won't be getting Sucker Punched.
 
Not one millisecond of any Battle LA teaser/trailer I've seen has made this Sci-Fi fan want to go see it. It's that obvious it sucks ass. I'm hearing from friends that it's even worse than I had surmised. SuckerPunch looks to be nothing more than a VFX orgy with a weak-ass story (is there really a story?) and "meh" performances all around. I'll throw it on the bottom of my Netflix queue and maybe it will show up someday.

I honestly don't know how a lot of this shit gets made. Seriously, don't get it. I'll admit, SuckerPunch is somewhat intriguing to me from a VFX perspective and Emily Browning with weapons and blonde pigtails looks cute. But no way in hell am I going to spend $10++ and waste 2 hours in an uncomfortable chair with a bunch of people around me texting instead of watching, just to see that. Oh, and for another $5 I can have the "IMAX Experience". LOL. Yeah, right.

I'm already getting roped into taking my kids to See "Hop" when it comes out. That's enough cine-masochism to last me the foreseeable future.

OK, I know it's bad form to bash a movie(s) I have not personally seen. But really... They can't even take the good bits, roll them into a trailer, and get me interested enough to buy a ticket. Sci-Fi is my favorite genre. And it is a genre that, sadly, Hollywood has lost all touch with.
 
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Throwing a few aliens into LA, a sci-fi makes not. Real downer on Sucker Punch (no, I never imagined it'd be good but I was hoping it was decent - if it's worse than World Invasion: Battle LA yeah well...)
Something must have changed while I was gone because it seems high-end market executives and producers are dropping sci-fi in favor of stupid lobotomized hollow "mystery" movies. Huh? Since when was sci-fi not a viable market? I guess I just don't get it...
 
it's funny now zack snyder's films are just progressively getting worse. think i'm gonna watch "Paul" this weekend instead. a martian with personality = win.
 
haven't watched battle LA myself, but many of the guys at my unit loves it... and at the sametime many of them hated it.
I did watch sucker punch earlier today however.... sound mix needs lots of work, tho for all i know it was the theater....
this is a movie for teenage boys. girls guns and explosions without much character and plot. It's all about getting a few "cool" shots and slomo action.

that said...... i want that bunny battle suit:-P
 
I thought Battle LA wasn´t that bad considering the last alien invasion flick was "Skyline", which is one of my all time worst. Almost as bad as "Dreamcatcher". hehehe, OUCH!
If Sucker Punch is as bad as Percy Jackson I might leave the show early to save on the parking ;)
 
I saw this movie with a group of the intended audience, Halo Reach and Gears of War fanatics who have subscriptions to Maxim. Not one of them liked it. They all hated it, every single one of them. I rank Battle LA higher because it knew what it was. Aliens land in LA and and the military rolls in to stop them. Plain and simple. Battle LA was horrible but at least you knew what the hell was going on. Sucker Punch was just just a craptastic montage of bad (IMHO) cg work, seizure-cam fight sequences, slow motion objects hitting the ground and girls in skimpy clothing dancing all mixed together with bad cover songs as background noise. I can't even begin to describe what a monumental disaster this film was. Sucker Punch was mind numbingly stupid. I am not sure if Snyder was trying to be deep but he directed possibly the most shallow, misogynistic and empty-headed film I have seen in a very long time. Avoid this one like the plague.
 
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Worse than Battle: Los Angeles? I have to disagree. I've seen both and Sucker Punch was not that bad... (not that that's saying much)
 
I liked Battle: LA, simply because I love watching explosion fests and massive gun fights. The trailer set it up as nothing more than that, so my expectations were in line with what the film delivered.

I've liked all of Zack Snyder's movies so far, so I will go see Sucker Punch anyway.
 
Mark Collins said:
I liked Battle: LA, simply because I love watching explosion fests and massive gun fights. The trailer set it up as nothing more than that, so my expectations were in line with what the film delivered.

I've liked all of Zack Snyder's movies so far, so I will go see Sucker Punch anyway.
Click to expand...

in that aspect its fun to watch. those scenes alone anyways. you know the action scene is suppose to connect, but ultimately doesnt matter. Great excuses to have girls guns and explosions ;-)
 
Mind you at what point did anyone who knows anything about film think that Sucker Punch would be good. It appears that its actually worse than I thought it would be, by the reviews I have read. Some producers need to start saying Zack...either you know nothing about scriptwriting, care nothing about it, or are unable to realise a script. Thanks for the morning laugh Andrew. Sorry you paid good paper for it. Like Jeff noted I would be interested from VFX artists prospective but luckily I don't have to pay for the cinema so its all a matter of having a few hours to kill and putting it on.

Is he not helming the new Superman movie?
 
jaadgy akanni said:
You obviously haven't yet subjected your precious time, eyes, and ears to "The Tourist"
Click to expand...

I went into that with a glimmer of hope for a Hitchcockian comedic romp. After 'The Lives of Others' being such a superb film I thought the director might have been able to pull something interesting off. How wrong was I...
 
A.O.Scott's review:
"You could go to see “Sucker Punch” this weekend — a lot of people probably will, and a few may even admit as much back at the office on Monday — or you could try to make it yourself, which might be more fun, though not necessarily cheaper. Here’s what you will need: a bunch of video-game platforms; DVDs of “Shutter Island,” “Kill Bill,” “Burlesque” and “Shrek”; some back issues of Maxim; a large bag of crystal meth; and around $100 million. Your imagination will take care of the rest."
 
Currently standing at 20% on Rotten Tomatoes and 36% on Metacritic.

Oh dear...
 
Guess I'll wait for the Blu-Ray. I have to admit that I am both terrified and curious to see what he will do with Superman since he said he isn't making Superman as a stylized project like he has done in the past.
 
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